Just mADE A PArabola og urine
Just met a girl...She is complaining why on facebook you can't have more then one "open relationship"
I dont know how i feel about her from a moral standpoint...
And just when I was about to fall asleep, he hit me in the face, and claimed he's a "violent sleeper".
all I know is he gave me a Cialis and tried to take me home.
My dildo fell into the bathtub. It sounded like a chainsaw.
I fucking hate you. Some slutty looking drunk chick backed her ass up across the bar and started grinding on you. You ignored her because you didn't want to share you drink
I care about my drink far more than her feelings
There's something very strange about masturbating in a hotel room. I feel like I'm cheating on my room...
Shitty. Well if it makes you feel any better I just had a toothless wasted crackhead in my bar who was mad because there are TOO MANY FUCKIN TREES in Nantucket.
I have bad memories with every alcohol but we manage to work through the problems for the good of the relationship
I definitely fucked a Trump supporter last night but I wouldn't let him fully admit it because then I would've had to leave and his cock and abs were too perfect
I woke up naked and you weren't here. What a relief.
and i thought it was paint or jizz but it was cheese
please tell me you didnt taste test that
I saw his new girlfriend. She was flashing people, short and kinda chubby. I was happy with my life after that.
I was just at the gas station and happened to look left and see a girl blowing some guy. How was your night?
scotch tastings during the week is a baaad idea. i woke up w no pants but wearing my winter coat
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