A hot woman with candy. This is what heaven is filled with
Just set a new record on Need For Speed at the arcade. Had to enter Tiger Woods as the name.
I woke up with spaghetti in my mouth
he cried for an hour, then he threw up on my lap then started singing party in the usa...opera style...
the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
Just saw a british exchange student take a flyer for free dental care. Yes.
It's happening again. I feel like I'm under water and my heart beat matches "Teenage Wasteland"
There are empty beer cans all over and the go-kart is missing. I need it for my halloween costume.
Woke up in a wet suit with my junk cut out. In a strange apartment. Just found thing biggest bong u have ever seen. WHERE ARE YOU?!?!?!
I will keep you posted and someday if we daydrink teach you how to do a footjob
Should I be concerned you put your last name in my phone as "danger"?
The other day I was really high and I felt like my words were coming out of my mouth in flowers...I don't know.
I had to give myself a suppository. That was the LEAST fun I've had inserting things in my ass.
Change the sheets & put your dick in the dishwasher. I'll see you in an hour.
Nothing like an afternoon walk of shame across campus on parent's weekend. Damn.
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