OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
My Vagina smells like Nemo again.
Just witnessed a walk of shame by a guy in a half gorilla suit. It's going to be a good day.
My grandma had to be escorted out by police.
i'm sure god appreciates how great my boobs look during this fine christmas eve mass
she just came into my room, drunkenly shoved six dollars into my bra and told me to spend it on chicken wings.
I don't think going to Relay for Life and painting our faces while everyone stares at us is a sufficent late night after the bars.
She wasn't to happy when she went to put her shirt on and it was covered in cum I just looked at her and said collateral damage....
No, listening to the fray and drinking a bottle of jack daniels does not count as counseling
just woke up on a lounge chair wearing a durag and holding burrito wrappers in my hands
Right now you and beer are my only friends.
Well if YOU HAVE TO KNOW, we're laying across the street from the bar on that grassy hill trying to see who's she's with at the bar.
Something is wrong here. The birds are chirping and I'm not fucking you, I'm not getting head and I don't smell bacon. Why am I up this early then?
I just want a man in my bed on a regular basis, who cuddles, and who I can also occasionally hang out with outside of my bedroom. Is that too much to ask for?
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