Like worst hickies ever he always gives them like wtf
Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
i just made a list of the people i have slept with. is it bad that some of them are just either names of the places i met them or the color of the shirts?
i also rounded the number up for good measure. i am sure there are a few i have forgotten about.
McDonalds has hash browns for only a quarter!....how many u want?
All of them
Leave Me Alone
At least least me cry on your voice mail
Apparently telling a group of crying girls that it looks like they need a visit from Dr. Phil isn't the best pickup line.
I'm concerned you might be passed out on a random rooftop right now. Not concerned enough to do anything about it. Hope you're alive. Goodnight.
Congratulations, you have helped solved the mysterious disapperance of Dani's phone which was found in the munchies cabinet next to the oreos. Your reward is star power as well as a fat ass bowl of Nebula. You may proceed through the wardrobe and into Narnia for your prize.
I'm unsure as to how you were able to snapchat me with your hands duck taped to beer, but I appreciated it nonetheless.
Is 1:30 too early for the bar?
Do you want my opinion or society's?
I want your company
It's called hot rabbit the party if he asks the password is "careful" don't ask
woke with Taco Bell next to me in bed and people's shoe sizes written on my arm.
Quick, I need a picture of your dick. Don't ask questions, just show me your genitals.
Earlier today I was eating cookie dough from a tube, now I'm laying naked next to a hot guy watching Pawn Stars in between orgasms. You really can have it all.
QUIT STEALING MY PHONE AND SEXTING MY MOM!!!!
Randomize
