So my mouth tastes like dick. Does that explain how our talk went?
is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
Ate pizza for the 3rd time today, can't decide if that's disgusting or an amazing aspect of American culture.
the last time i saw him was an hour he was floating face down in a pool... but i'm sure he's fine.
His IQ is so high, I swear I started ovulating when he told me the number.
The first guy I ever sexted is having a baby.. Is this what adulthood feels like?
The only way he could ever pleasure me is if he lit himself on fire and let me watch
this party is nice, but i have to go home and cry over anime in order to fill my daily quota of suffering
ALSO I MAYBE ACCIDENTALLY HAND CUFFED MYSELF TO A CHAIR
Nothing more awkward that being butt ass naked in a guys bed and his ex wife shows up with his kid....
My friends got engaged today and I learned the techniques of going upside down on a stripper pole. I'm not really sure who won...
THERE IS A MAN IN THE BATHROOM IN COLONIAL GARB GET HERE
He came into my room last night and started peeing underneath my desk, I told him the bathroom was the next door over.
I've been getting a lot of emails from patron lately for being a great customer. Is that awesome, or should I start thinking about seeking help?
I just got dumped by my fuck buddy. Now I have to have sex with my husband.
Randomize