I dont know whether to be proud of myself for not driving, or being proud that i was so messed up I couldnt drive
This is getting serious. I keep forgetting what's in my vagina.
my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
I don't appreciate you drunk dressing passed-out me in spandex for bed
I hope he didn't notice that my shirt was inside out when I told him I didn't have sex with the guy. Kind of a dead giveaway.
Getting up is taking longer than anticipated. Alcoholic fish bowls have made getting out of bed a multitstep process.
IS SOBER OCTOBER A THING?? WTF WHO ARE THESE PEOPLE?
Dude. Going to the Theme park the day after the 4th of July was the worst idea I've ever had.
Dad's teaching me to make moonshine this weekend as "college prep". How scared should I be sis?
Because my vagina is Ellis Island. All foreign penises must be presented for inspection and competency. God bless America.
When we missed a fist bump and simultaneously did the Rocket Power handshake I knew I was going to blow him.
Back at condo with chick. What is the condom situation urgent response needed
I can't tell if this is a hangover or just a perfect combination of shame and regret
I spend so much of my life shaving my body hair off and I want nothing more than his beard in all my hairless places.
He'd never survive you. Is there a boot camp for pre-heather training?
Randomize
