I CAN MOONWALK!
Dude. Creed is coming in september.
We're no longer friends.
you were chalanging people to drink the "worlds biggest jager bomb" - a VASE of Redbull and a PINT of Jager... is it no wonder you dont remember anything?
I woke up pulling sunflower seeds out of my vagina. That kind of night.
I'm like the Mother Theresa of booty calls.
You told me to pour the Gatorade on you "like Flashdance"
Thats like me asking what you think of antisocial polish guys with mysterious rashes
New reason to drink: alcohol makes soda taste like goddamn gold.
Aaaand the winner of the worst decision of Sunday night goes to me as I pull up to his house in my lingerie.
It's amazing where one well timed dick pic can get you in life.
she was puking nonstop out of the car window in the rain during our hour long drive back, we got lot of honks
...I watched him run on the beach yesterday and I think I started ovulating
So the tow truck driver didn't charge us because Ian convinced him that he was sent out by God to share his cocaine with us.
Do you think I could use my teacher of month Award to get free drinks?
Well it was okay until he pinned my arms over my head and I found the loaded pistol tucked behind the bed... THIS IS WHY WE DON'T FUCK BOYS IN MONTANA ANYMORE
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