Why is half of me covered in green stuff that won't come off?
You stripper-danced on a light pole in the quad. It had fresh paint on it.
We traveled between two mile markers in 18 seconds. Do the math.
his text ended with ... everyone knows dot dot dot equals infer sexy time
I wouldnt endorse that guy if he was walking in a walkathon to raise money for a disease i had
On a side note, I now know what a $150 cab ride looks like
Don't take this the wrong way but I just mistook a trash can for you
Our adventure is going to pick up his pipe and weed that he ditched when he got pulled over the other day.
HOT DATE.
my mom took me to a gay bar and went on and on about all her good times at clubs... i now know where i get it
I love our strategizing... I wish we used the same passion for planning our lives and future that we use for planning our drunken escapades... We would both be doctors by now, I swear
At our floor meeting the RA was talking about bathroom hygiene and I really wanted to be like "what about shower sex."
Valid question
Neil John just started open mouth kissing everyone to make sure they are safe.
I plan on having so much gay sex in our house while you gone.
he just cleaned his wound with pinnacle whipped
it was the most awkward makeout ever. it was record breaking really
...i feel like you have a lot of those.
Is there a way to use porn to inspire him to have dirty thoughts? Like the movie Inception except with more lube and orgams?
Randomize
