Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
You know if a vagina was a face, it'd be ugly as hell...
No jewlry, no bra, and no pen. I couldnt be more prepared for a friday morning class.
she must've caught on when i went out for a "run" in jeans and a sweatshirt and came back holding a McDonalds bag and smelling like pot.
I woke up with a flask of whiskey and a mason jar full of sausage in my tux jacket. south georgia is where i belong
woke up to the trail of sugar cubes leading to my bed........was i that uncooperative last night
keep an eye on me. i'm afraid that after a few more drinks i'll ask to borrow his wheelchair.
I'll be heading downtown with donuts and a lawn chair at 9am to go Halloween Walk o' Shame spotting.
Yeah you fell over while you were peeing and you said "hold I'm, I'm still peeing"
The kid I'm babysitting just asked if I had a boyfriend. WHY IS A FOUR YEAR OLD MAKING ME FEEL BAD ABOUT MY LIFE
No, no, we have to calibrate. What is the maximum amount of trouble we can get into without going to jail?
Technically my penis started a fight tonight
They gave me patron and potatoes I couldn't say no
all i know is there's a picture on my phone of him wearing my purple sweatpants and licking the bottom of my foot.
Not sure but if it exists I will find it and I will fill my face with it
Randomize
