i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
dude, best porn name ever, "the Hunt for Red Cocktober"
is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
There was jim beam in your oven. I just preheated it.
just had amazing sex with a girl I got caught with in second grade playing doctor. her examination is finallllly over
Didn't get to fuck her. Had to leave abruptly through window. Explain later.
Trying to figure out which chair my head was under last night
When the doctor said the anal leakage might not be reversible without some lifestyle changes you start asking if it's worth the entertainment value.
Rumble strips road head = magical
Just to an Octoberfest and a sex party. Nothing wild.
I'd help you out but I got Bacardi and Tequila poured down my snorkel last night and I'm still drunk
i may or may not have bought a plane ticket for a russian cam girl to fly here. also, can you spot me $300 on rent?
I mean, it was a fun hookup and he's cute and whatnot, but he wouldn't go down on me. Plus he's a republican. Idk why but those things feel like they go hand in hand.
I was floored. Like way less concerned with him using drugs than I am with him not believing in evolution.
He just canceled. I got an amazing new dress and now he’s decided he’s spending the weekend with his family
In other news, there’s some rando in an expensive hotel bar who is going to get very lucky tonight because I love the way this dress makes my tits look. Want to help me find him?
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