Got a plan. Ill do rock paper scissors and if you win we smoke a joint. Throw rock.
i will never coherently bang her
i just looked up and i was like omg ballsack and then i didnt know what to do
When we woke up, I asked if we could play "what does your name rhyme with".....he said 'bave' thank god it was easy
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
i think i left my bra at your place
It's still hanging from my ceiling fan. Please let me keep it there.
I got head to The Nanny. Officially gay.
he laminated a picture of his dick.
I let a naked juice spill down my leg for like 30 minutes bc i thought i was hallucinating that my leg was cold.
In the middle of the State of the Union, she unzipped my pants and started giving me head. I've never been so proud to be an American.
I'm giving great sideboob & it's being wasted on my parents.
He just ranted to some customer about fourth of July being ruined and I just shouted USA the whole time in the background. It was kinda epic
They were supposed to legalize it when there was a chance someone might actually propose to me. I'm appealing this bullshit.
Florida is balancing how much this place sucks with how many vodkas you can have to cope in order to still be allowed on the plane to leave
It's been a week I should not still be finding glitter in my pants.
Randomize
