maybe if you didn't yell 'buh duh duh da duh da dats all folks' when you came she wouldn't have left last night
My morning has consisted of lying in a fetal position, eating a whole tub of ben and jerry's, talking to my cat, and setting all of our pictures on fire. Does that answer your question?
after I pulled back my foreskin she said, "cool like a transformer". I really like her now.
the girl I was having sex with just mumbled victory for msu during sex. i love basketball season
We are lost. Everyone is drunk and it all went downhill after we iced the bus driver.
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
He started to lose his balance halfway through his "commencement speech" at the top of the staircase. The rest is bloody, profanity-laiden history.
He tried to bang a 300 pounder last night. No joke. I shotgunned a tall boy in a bar cuz the bartender didn't crack the beer. Cant wait till Nashville.
Remember when puke and rally meant a good time? Fuck pregnancy
I think i should wear mittens next time we have sex.
I just remembered you throwing bread at me and getting me to drink water out of a heineken bottle. You are my best friend.
In the future, could you not call me 'bro' while we're having sex?
I need thought I would ever have to use the phrase "Don't fart on that Calzone".. Thanks for that
I forgot that I'm high because of how high I am.
So it turns out that a Ford Focus does not fit in a Walmart cart return.
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