Our friend ended up naked, bleeding, requesting we throw a couch at him cause he was convinced he could block it
We did he did.
When I say naked, I mean penis exposed. Not in boxers
it was the worst sex ever in the history of sex. i mean ever. and he thought he was great. actually told me he was the best id ever had...what was i supposed to say? lol...i've had better times by myself. seriously.
Babe, I need to be clear. I DO NOT WANT TO HAVE ANAL. Never. No anal. No "talking about it"
It involved anal and pop rocks. Tell me how that could have ended well.
You got cut off after you tried to make the dog funnel moscato.
Nothing like buying a handle and a 36 pack with a baby strapped on.
At least your night didn't end with three cops seeing your ass and you sitting on the ground in a wig throwing your shoes at people
He fell on top of me at a party. I slept with him a week later. We've been fucking for 2 moths. Most successful relationship ever.
I'll always remember 2012 as the year I hooked up with countless girls who had the sides of their heads shaved.
I didn't have the heart to tell him that the reason my vagina was so "prelubricated" was because I had just had another gentleman caller an hour earlier. So, when he commented about how turned on I appeared, I just went with it.
She looks well worn, presumably from a cavalcade of penis.
I cuddled with a man named Pickles
You had a 45min conversation with the Ronald McDonald statue I have the video to prove it
Dude i woke up today by a pile of fried chicken and wearing a bra
.......stop going to frat parties....
I am NOT losing my v-card to a guy who doesn't know my ass from my elbow.
Randomize
