break up sex still means we will always be broken up.
$4 taco and $400 parking ticket. i am not a cheap date.
I can't remember last night. I must have yelled at your girlfriend til she cried again.
Yup.
The more I throw up, the more I am remembering exactly what I drank last night...in order.
Yea...coming from the girl who didn't understand why m&ms and tequila wasn't a "suitable diet"
Taking my infected piercing out in the parking lot of the food card place. This is one of those life defining moments that makes me sad.
wow. there is a man who hates the post office more than me. he is causing a scene, this is a snapshot of elderly me.
If you're mature enough to fuck him you're mature enough to tell him you don't want a relationship come on
You guys wanna start around 10:30 tomorrow?
We can start at 5am for all I care. You ask like I have plans.
Is there a greeting card for "I can't keep being The Other Woman"?
I could drive to your house and kick you in the nuts right now....and not even stop for a burrito
Is it weird to smoke a bong with a client from work?
So you thought it was a good idea to make plans for the same time same place with the guy you were sort of dating AND his best friend you slept with?
Doing shots with my high school valedictorian. Bucket list
so you can go out and drink with me then fuck me, or you can come over when i get home and fuck me, or you can come over before and fuck me, or you can come over before and after and fuck me... so many fucking options
Randomize
