the fucking easter bunny is here. he just made 3 cups in a row. no one knows who he is..
He came into the hospital yelling "HEY EVERYBODY! REMEMBER ME?"
Yelling drunk tank or bust at a cop, not a good idea
plus shes a stripper, ive been with strippers, if you fuck this up your penis will never forgive you
Hey, you guys have all had chicken pox, right?
I need to get skinnier so that I know when pregnancy scares are real...
Dude just walked down the street literally wearing nothing but a small box around his waist carrying a case of beer. I want to live here for the rest of my life.
you have a wonderful penis attached to someone I'm having a lot of problems with right now
This is amazing. I can pinpoint the window in time that you lost all sanity.
I wonder how he feels knowing that he's the one who turned me gay
No one understands the complete and utter debilitating 3 day bday bender.
I took a 19 year old to a strip club and ended up in a three way. Divorced life might be OK.
Im going to hell I gave him a handjob on the plane next, to an old guy playing video games on his iPad, on good friday.
You're the third Mark I've fucked in that bed.
We played 2 very competitive games of Jenga and then fucked our brains out... BEST. RELATIONSHIP. EVER.
Randomize
