Can a clitoris grow tomatoes? Its symbolic and rhetorical.
and before you know it i was laying next to him at 2 in the morning with penis and sadness on my breath.
What do you do when the person in the stall next to you says they're jealous?
Excuse me? I'm weird? You're the one sticking your penis into a pringles can.
Woke up to sesame street reruns and a $62 pizza bill. Never again. I mean it this time.
Nyquil jello-shots aiding in health and happiness
4 to the list in one week. Slutsville isn't as fun as the brochure promised.
I was so high I told him we should rub faces and pretend to be wombats. He was surprisingly enthusiastic about it.
Because you stood over the Ice luge screaming STONE COLD and poured beer on everyone
when he pulled his cock out I told him he'd brought a knife to a sword fight
Is it possible to rally from a drunken seizure?
I'm watching porn in spanish. Thats studying right?
That makes 14 Xmas cards already! Middle aged people are really nice to their dealers.
WHO GIVES HANDJOBS AT 8 IN THE FUCKING MORNING
nobody put me to bed and I ended up peeing on a tree and got written up
Randomize
