i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
they just did a mariachi cover of free bird
I think even Ryan Seacrest is disgusted with the thought of Ryan Seacrest getting some.
we're all still whores. we just have a theme song now.
We are hot boxing the gondola
I hate everything.
Slowly realizing that my only incentive to bathe is shower beer
I want to buy her liposuction. And a spot on What Not To Wear. And a face transplant.
did i really sing to your nipples last night?
yes. and it was oddly very seductive
And now I have fucked a local celebrity so double free drinks at bars.
So when this rash is gone wanna hang out?
Easy Mac and you are the sexiest things in my life
You called me into the kitchen so you could show me that you were peeing in the kitchen sink and then told me to leave bc you couldn't do it with me watching
Listen I'm tryna celebrate your divorce. Sometimes that calls for drinking on the toilet.
Is there anything more American than getting day drunk and watching Hulk Hogan promos?
I just snorted sandwich everywhere.
I hope it smells nice :)
IT DOESN'T BECAUSE I HAVE MEAT COMING OUT OF MY NOSE, DAMNIT.
Randomize
