...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
is it bad if my mug shot looks better than my profile picture?
I finally had sex with him last night, but we used a condom so it doesn't add to my number of sexual partners.
Dude, I just saw a sixteen year old girl in a catholic school uniform buying a pregnancy test... With a coupon!
Last night I walked out of the bar got in a cab asked the cabi to circle the block. he did and brought me right back to the bar. I paid him $7 thanked him and walked back into the bar.
you spent 5 minutes trying to open an empty PBR and kept saying "don't worry i'll get it i've been working out"
I don't know, but I don't want you to think its ok to show up at my house at 4 am with a gorilla suit and a bucket of pinnapple and think id be ok with it
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
There's still flour in my hair. And I don't even want to know what the neighbors think happened infront of my house.
I'm eating captain crunch out of a cup half full of beer so idk
At the bar, some guy bumped into you and you screamed "hey, don't touch what you can't afford sunshine!"
Three Asian guys got on the elevator with a handle of Hennessey and a sleeping bag. This is not the start of a joke.
I just had to explain why I ate a whole quart of mac and cheese before 8am. Not a good start to the day
Thanks for being my best friend so I can use you as an alibi to my family while I'm out getting some dick in my face.
Slept in and having coffee. No sounds of whipping and no veiny dildos next to me. This is good. How's your mornin?
Randomize
