dude, she was giving me a lapdance and her thong had a skid mark. no I did not hit it.
Why do I feel like I'm not the only one drinking to make my night class teacher look better?
But it's a terrible idea. One erection and it's gonna go wrong
dude you guys. You can't throw up in the recycling bin. I don't think vomit is recyclable
I'm voting my liver organ of the month. The award ceremony is next weekend.
He said last night that he'd never had such a great conversation and such a great handjob at the same time.
With any luck I will spend the duration of this flight with my tray table up my seatbelt securely fastened and my face in his lap
I'm not judging you... I'm judging our friendship
its been so long even thinking about having a dick inside me makes me sore
Ok in all seriousness. Alcohol intake is now restricted for me. I found handcuffs in my trunk.
We just got busted fucking in the hammock by his roommate...I'm so out of here as soon as hes asleep....
So, my love of dick may have landed me in a cult. On the bright side, I now have a discount at Spencer's.
you asked the cab driver if he wanted to meet your parents, last night.
Haha just talked to the dude you bit on Thursday. He has been growing a beard to hide the bruising....
when she didn't finish her burrito you wanted to call the cops because you said it was neglect
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