the last time I saw her she was leaving the mens bathroom and club rush with her dress inside out. typical tease.
she needs to learn to take compliments like she takes dicks.
she told me her two favorite things were grocery stores and dick.
We haven't even started dating yet but I already decided I'm going to cheat on her
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
oh awks just saw the head of medical staff who I punched the bottle of wine at
you got me arrested i just think that goes without question you owe me a blowjob
You had salsa out and brought a banana on a plate to bed
It is a sign that I need a fresh start when Kelly Clarksons new album tells the story of my life.
Pizza rolls are incredible. They are like sex, except I have them sometimes
When have we listened to the rational side of either of us?!
fond memories of taking my pregnancy test here in this Burger King
High-fiving last weekend's hook up in passing on the way to class has given me quite the lady boner.
WHY IS SHE PANDERING YOU, A SIMPLE GOBLIN, TINY WEENER PICTURES OVER STATE LINES
It's a shame things ended how they did. We were well on our way to transforming from acquaintances with benefits to friends with benefits.
Randomize
