i just realized how high i was when i was screaming red light challenge at the top of my lungs and am watching it alone
Just heard the new 'We are the world' ... Can I get my 10 bucks for Haiti back?
I've got 15 minutes to eat dinner and drink a 40. Four years of college has all been training for this moment.
Just mixed my liver cleanse with Bacardi. Best. Thing. Ever.
i would bitch about being this hungover, but honestly im just happy to be alive after this weekend
When I sent you a text telling you to splash water on your face, you texted me back with 'Iwehre N qyull.'
he told me to hold it and try to write my name in the snow and it seemed like a bonding moment because neither one of us had ever done that before. i didn't anticipate it vibrating and weirding me out therefore making me let go and get my hand peed on.
Ok in all seriousness. Alcohol intake is now restricted for me. I found handcuffs in my trunk.
I wish I could remember her name, I mean we fucked and all, but it woulda been nice to tag her in the instagram pics.
I threw up in the darkest corner of the bar last night, then watched 2 girls freak out in disgust after walking through it. I then realised I puked on the dancefloor, took a picture and proceeded to send it to my mom.
There's someone howling in the parking lot. Haha.
Dumb decision of the night...walking home drunk and smelling my pepper spray
Ims textiofg thsi woht my noes bcuz my hansd aer stli handcuffde to teh bedfrme. Help me
He was nothing but deer-caught-in-headlight eyes and dick, it was adorable
I'm hoarding IKEA meatballs in my purse
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