i friday night watching house. god, i need a life, friends, and a legitimate fake id.
Sorry, I don't speak sober.
They've started ranking girls from "paper-bag" to "I just came." Please come get me
You threw a bottle at the bartender and then stole his tip jar. However, you were quickly KO'd by the bartender. Solid right hook.
Totally forgot this... How weird was it when they were licking our faces
he gets drunk and then tries to eat the lasers at the dance club
i was on the fence about his sexual orientation until he referred to his marlboro loghts as "carrie bradshaws"
After we fucked he shhhh'd me and said your welcome
The beer shits the day after completing the World Beer Tour at Epcot are just as epic as the tour itself.
omg his dad is hot
... I'm currently away at the moment. Leave a msg since I cannot express how much I can't help you stop ruining peoples lives.
I wore a shirt that says "more tequila" to my bday party last year and that's why I want to be my own friend
It looks like you got dick slapped by the sandman..
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
i love how you, my friend, sends me a picture of herself wearing a shirt that says "i am dead inside" and i'm just like "awww baby you're so cute"
that's just solidarity
Hey
Gfdhklhgfxzyuikl$
GODDAMNIT WHY AM I MISSING THIS
Randomize
