3:38a: you guys up to anything right now?
Full bush! Can't stay! Need ride! Come on bro!
Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
Had sex five times today because there was nothing else to do. I had no idea snow days could get even better than when we were kids
If we break up, I want weekend visitations with your penis.
Obviously. I'm here to let you eat things off my boobs and help you get laid.
I have lots of feelings today, but drunk is my favorite.
I fucking hate tequila. Tequila makes me hate pants.
The important thing is that she is gone, presumably back to the depths of hell from whence she came.
Don't judge me 👊🏼 his dick just whispers my name
If I ever drink whiskey again make sure I don't eat the plastic cups that I'm drinking them from.
I love how fuckboys immediately become cultured when I tell them I’m an artist.
You're a FUCKING ASSHOLE. Love mom
yeah. i tried to refuse to leave unless the burger king himself escorted me out. that didnt fly
may or may not have snorted a line of tums... wtf.
Randomize
