The best feeling....farting and having the bubble hit your balls
If i could bang her from 80ft away, I would
worse things have happened to me. but if it will make you feel better you can pay for my therapist sessions next week.
You say "I'm in class" like it matters... I'm getting a little tired of having to smoke by myself at 4:20 because you're in class.
Just got cockblocked by coyotes. This would happen to me.
I'm pretty sure he's lost all respect for me. it probably happened somewhere around the time i had officially slept with every single one of his friends..
your blue lips and tongue was their first indication you were probably underage
HEY THERE IS NO AGE LIMIT ON BLUE SLUSHIES
Gosh, I don't even have that. Let alone someone to tie me up and whip me with Twizzlers.
At this point I think you're just judging my taste in men
I just had a spiritual connection with my sweater and did ballet in the hallway. Alone. I'd say we're gonna chalk that up as a win for marijuana and call it a night
My goal is to be drunk before we even get out of the No Wake Zone.
Not a problem, sailor. I speak both autocorrect and typo.
So, if you were also having sex around 11pm, then we were legitimately being penetrated at the exact same time. That is amazing. We are soul sisters.
It really hurts to walk. Any idea what happened to my hip?
If she didn't have scissors in her hand I would have motor boated the fuck out of her when she was done cutting my hair.
Randomize
