One of my students just wrote an essay on how ninjas, like drug addicts, must realize they need help before they can get better...I gave it an A+
my math professor just wrote "parallel" on the board, but spelled it "pararrel". guess what country he's from
my brother is about to go smoke a joint outside... he's preparing his munchies on the counter beforehand. I admire his responsibility.
They let you pick the name that they announce for you at graduation. The professional world needs to prepare itself for papa smurf mcdonald.
I just got home. Seriously all I remember is taking out my contacts and putting your balls in my mouth.
the theme of the baby shower is Nightmare On Prego Street
I feel that shower jager is exactly what this man needs after last night.
You're a disgrace to gay men everywhere.
Using a joint as a bookmark. What is my life?
Do you know how much wine is in a box of wine? Not so much an amount, but whether it will kill me if I drink the entire box this xmas
The hair on my legs is officially flapping in the breeze when I walk. I must say, being single does have perks and this is one of them.
Way to go. Now you have no beer and I have a cold tit.
So we decided we're going to stop having sex...except for tonight. And probably tomorrow.
Congrats on graduating and I'm in a cab and need someone to helps keeping me up, do you mind
Good friends chat about sex - great friends ask about safe words.
I sent him nudes while he is at work because I am an evil human being.
Randomize
