all I remember was being half naked drinking water on my hands and knees from her dogs water bowl.
She made a guy cry in the bar. I will have her, oh yes, I will have her..
what made you think it was a good idea to trust the girl that hides tequila in her backpack?
I feel like every car around me knows I'm driving in my snuggie
Yeah things got weird. You ate an entire bag of hotdog buns, then tried to catch a tree on fire with a candle.
In the ER. 2nd degree burns. Drunken attempt to make gasoline scented candles.
Good, she had spurs on her boots. That is a sign for instant herp attack.
Wondering when "babysitting" formed into "sleeping on the couch for five hours nursing a hangover and giving the kids Nyquil."
We could supplement the Tour with Edward Andre-hands. Because 40s are for the 99%.
how many thumbs am i supposed to have at one time
you found the shrooms didnt you
Just think Febushuary. A whole month of 70's esque bush! This is the dream
I'm pretty sure the girl in the stall next to me is waiting on me to leave so she can poop but I'm doing the same thing so it's like a Mexican standoff
I knew it was you who came home last night because no one else would walk in at 3 am and start microwaving a burrito
You took one look at him and said "let's hope I don't remember this tomorrow" then you took another shot and chased it with a beer.. I guess it was a success.
I just realized I had arrested my one night stand from last night...
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