that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
I want him to get the hint. I sent 4 texts that only said "sex."
does anyone know how to get red sharpie out of a white cat?
Dude you should see the looks were getting for ordering a pitcher of beer with breakfast.
Welp, she's chewing our paper towels again. She's like an obnoxiously hot puppy
BIGGER SANDWIJH COME NIW OR DIE
Imagine the time you most wanted to kill yourself. Now add a room full of jail bait and no booze. Multiply that by a million.
Take advantage man but know that every anal bead u drop inside her will make her love u 2% more. It's science
You keep saying things....but all I'm hearing is kegs
We haven't been trashed enough to shut down a bar together in four days. I'm starting to worry that we're growing apart.
Yeah we were on bar number 7 on our bike trail and you decided to steal my bike and we found you 20 minutes later eating Cheetos in the shallow end of your parents pool
Nothing kills the mood quicker than kneeing him in the face during sex
We've been watching Scooby Doo and having sex for the past 36 hours, so life is great
We watched ESPN, hooked up, got waffles. You know, a typical weekend.
I was just told that I'm the Sherlock Holmes of drunken sex. I'll take it.
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