We won't sleep together?
the only thing i knew about you is that u dated jordan and were potentially interested in a threesome
I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
After she threw up on my floor she started singing "this is why I'm hot."
Dude... Hand job in the lake... It was as weird as it sounds.
its time for step 4 of getting over him: post his number on the transvestite page on craigs list asking for pics
He counted every piece of macaroni in the box and then faceplanted into the bowl
I am going to piss jack daniels before daylight.
Daylight. It is daylight. Who will give you a ride back?
I hope no one. I want to walk and have a bus hit me.
He said he didn't want to go down on me so I told him we were going to have an oral stalemate.
He made me watch a sex tape him and his gf made. They were in the shower when her roommate walked in on them. Not kidding: she asked to join in.
I hate him. He gets laid, my dick gets laughed at.
Literally sucked a dick for ten seconds before I said to myself, this tiny ass penis isn't worth it. My night last night
i just got carded for condoms. wtf.....this is new. isnt safe sex a good thing?
Guys I ate pizza off the fucking ground of the cab. I am the worst type of person
You think the guy at the speed wash knows he needs to scrub the vomit off the side of my car?
He knew.
There’s an entire generation of people out there who didn’t grow up watching Mr. Rogers and it shows. These Boomers need to get their shit together.
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