i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
halloween makes it hard to decipher real cops... from sexy men dressed up as them.
Covered in glitter and dick. 2010 feels a lot like 2009.
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but my underwear and it was on backwards and my entire body is too sore to move...
Im glad someone is finally more of a drunken slut than I am.
But on the up side she uprooted a whole peony plant from the hotel downtown and said, "I brought you flowers"
My booty call just put me down for a reference for her job at the hospital. What am I supposed to say? She gives great bj's?
You know it's a good party when even the dealers were too fucked up. Just found and counted 140 E pills I found in a bag in the couch. Just paid for weed this month.
I asked a lamppost to be my valentine. Also: I'm wearing a sombrero. We need more sombrero in our lives.
Sorry I need more motivation then McDonalds and mojitos.
I think it's safe to say I'm rolling my hypothetical balls off
So the next time I call you and say I'm going to my first strip club because it's christmas eve eve, and have work the next morning, I'd appreciate you stopping me
He meowed while sucking on my nipple, it got even weirder when he said he was trying to moo.
Finding out you're not a mother on Mother's Day >>>
i'm high and self actualising, please send help
What's that? Is there a bottle of Jack calling me? I think so...
Randomize
