He's gotten way too comfortable around me. He came into the bathroom and took a shit while I was in the shower.
i'm pretty sure i lost all sex appeal when he caught me peeing in his bushes
this is a time for prayers...seriously
let us hold hands and pray.. sweet baby jesus please bring us some sweet sweet man loving this homecoming weekend to aid our lonely vaginas it has been a long couple of weeks amen.
Pretty sure that drunken football on the back porch with 6 guys with a champagne bottle was a bad idea....
I'm considering failing out of my last semester of college just so I can keep fucking him.
Managed to get through family dinner without anyone knowing I was tripping balls. Christmas miracle. He exists.
i was really disappointed no one would drink beer from our cleavage last night except for us
We fucked in my trunk while on the clock....what did you do at work today?
Siri makes being stoned even easier. I don't even Have to type my texts myself
Though I typed a half of that one
Apparently when the cops arrived I was standing over him in the bathroom yelling, get the fuck up you piece of shit. Beer still in hand.
I just pawned the ring from my ex boyfriend to replace the ring I lost from my current boyfriend. #thanks
Visions of polite missionary are dancing in my head right now kinda and it alarms me
Now in listening to Jerome Bettis speak at the hall of fame and my boner just started twirling a terrible towel
They weren't kidding when they said "Go Army Strong." Best sex I ever had.
I’m doing some soul searching to figure out how much of a slut I’m going to be the rest of the summer.
Randomize
