K, im just throwing this out there, i am not making out with any of his friends... Especially the cross eyed one.
WHY DOES GOD HATE MY DICK
I just withdrew $200 in ones. I think the teller knew what was up
That fucking fat Asian kid that NOBODY invited is stuck in the dryer again
well i fell out of the hot tub and tumbled down the hill and kicked a plant in the process.
I just had to explain to my 62 year old advisor what "tea-bagging" was in the middle of her lecture. I smell extra credit. And maybe a demonstration.
Come over we're celebrating the one month anniversary of her first 4/20
I'm wearing green eyeshadow so even if I end up totally naked I still won't get pinched.
He said he cried as he watched porn yesterday; I'd say he's taking the break-up pretty bad....
I have just found the cubicle of sustenance. And I will rejoice at all the families that have not found this magic. This vodka cubicle of magic.
Please call us Steph is okay but missing phone wallet tooth
Ahh yes. I lost my pants and swimming suit and phone charger. And I've found out who has them all even while hungover. Successful day. Nice party too.
I am convinced you could sleep through the apocalypse and only wake up because youre hungry & want Dominoes
its like i get a dick upgrade with every new guy i screw, at this rate i'm scared to see my next one
were you aware we were supposed to be taking care of her hamster this weekend?
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