white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
I totally give up. Optimus Prime just fell from the top of the Great Pyramid into the hypostyle hall at Karnak.
i would hope so, cause i don't think 'i drove off the road because i was getting some head' is covered in insurance
I think when she wakes up, she'll either kill me, or laugh. I hope she laughs.
So I'm up to masturbating three times a day, drunk textin my ex, not doing any hw and I've failed half of my tests so far
Sounds better than last semester
Dude she has the ugliest blow job face ever.
I just found out my mom named me after her fake ID from college...
he payed over $300 just to break into the hotel pool and skinny dip alone for 5 minutes and then peace in a cab. and all he had to say for himself was "gotta go swimming, gotta live life"
where do u find these people!?
I had to smuggle a street sign attached to a 14ft long pole out of my house this morning. The list of reasons for me not to drink just keeps getting longer.
Dude what the fuck...
Also, I just opened Google to find the lyrics to California Gurls. Karaoke night did us dirty.
Since I won't be making love with anyone on a bed of roses this year on Sunday I bought a Mustang to fill the gap
My vagina measures dicks. It's accurate to the half inch.
i think we sleep fucked last night...
Do you remember feeding the vacuum doritos last night?
My butthole is tingling. Must be the grapefruit juice
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