i just saw a midget buying condoms and graham crackers. i wonder which was the impluse buy.
my professor just told me i smelt like a brewery infront of my whole class b4 my final presentation
the weed was in a baggy that had little penguins on it. i am so excited you have no idea
I came home to burning cookies and him outside "tanning" naked.
He just wants an even tan
And there are taco shells on the ceiling fan
Around noon tomorrow come looking for me. I'll be on Mill wearing whatever clothes I haven't lost yet. DO NOT REPLY. DO NOT ASK QUESTIONS. JUST DO IT.
I know. It's cray. Crayon. Crayolaaaaa.
I imagine my service panda will provide sufficient protection. At the very least it will be an irresistible cuddly distraction while I make good my escape.
The drunk people on this bus are singing Journey songs. This is the whitest thing I've ever experienced
Ive only just recently decided that NOT fucking you would be best for both of us.
Kick open the door, strike a pose, steal a boyfriend, end scene.
No he reached for my hand at the beach. I pretended to be a seagull.
Pretty sure if we keep hanging out on Tuesdays there will be no whiskey left for the younger generations or the universe will implode....tomato tahmato
Hey. I hope you have enough room in your car for me and a Honda civic front bumper.
you can't just call dibs on my vagina bro.
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