Don't forget I'm 20 now
I liked you more when you were 19
also, made friends with this 75 year old millionaire Tony who likes to mosh. Don't ask.
Pretty people don't get stds, I knew it
his logic is that since hes already cheated on her w me its doesnt count
you went through ur friends list and posted an obscene comment on every ultrasound pic...."not his" "looks like a sea monkey"
My student's should feel privledged to see me tuesday after the amount of alcohol I consumed this weekend.
She stopped mid-blowjob to introduce herself to us
almost getting arrested is turning into fucking this cop in his ex wife's lawn. see you tomorrow
Trying to figure out which chair my head was under last night
Hey so I just want to get straight to the point it was me who ate the last cupcake and it was your sister who I fucked last nigt
He's like a hurricane
a drunk, sexist, hurricane
I try not to flex my sex appeal too much around the engineers, it's like feeding bears...always ends in disaster.
Between his smile and monumental dick even the virgin mary woulda blown that man and I am far from the virgin. I didn't stand a chance.
my personal favorite... An "I'm sorry you broke your finger and cant play sports for awhile" blowjob!
My face is going numb. I think it's time I call it quits
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