My relationship with VH1 is so bittersweet
wouldnt it be awesome if walks of shame were like charity walks...you could get sponsors and shit and donate money to curing STDs or cancer
i really should have bought real food rather than condoms, olives, coleslaw and beer...
He was ugly. Like horse ugly. But he was built for power, not for speed.
All I can remember is being told by a guy named Kyle to stay in the corner until the cops left. Then waking up on a porch outlined in beer cans 8 blocks from my house. Pregaming for college.
I just had my first boner in 64 days today....glad to find out my fluids are still pumpin
Jasmine is diving into bushes again.
She just told me she thinks she bruised her labia in class
Someone sharpied "COCK HUNGRY" on my butt cheeks last night. When the fuck did I have my ass out?
I woke up on a navy base in a different time zone. I'm never leaving tallahassee again.
Bruh why you gotta judge
You're awake at 3:30 in the morning RSVPing to a musical, I'm well within my means
As soon as he called me 'darling' in that Scottish accent... my pants just dropped.
She's nice. But even when I am with her I am thinking of her mom, literally the hottest woman on earth.
dude you pointed at my dad's crotch and said I'd tap that. I didn't even know you were gay.
That’s the third time this month he’s hooked up with a girl by telling her it’s his bachelor party, and he’s not even dating a chick let alone engaged.
Randomize
