yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
so now that im really awake i see that my underwear are completely ripped down the side, my shorts are on backwards, i have to go get plan b....i call last night an epic fail or success depending on how catholic i am feeling
i take joy in having bigger boobs than others
I'm at a party watching some dude try to eat a whole package of Oreos in 5 minutes.
having someone tell me to "prepare my vagina" is not really something I want to hear..
How the hell do you leave a party with a kitten? It's missing and everyone knows it was you.
In the bath trying to absorb water through my skin because I can't drink it.. That hungover
I'm surprised they let us keep partying at that hotel bar, that's like the 3rd time I've had to try blocking the view of him peeing off the balcony. I earn my free drinks.
Dude, get out of Andrea's vagina and call me back
We had sex in the church bell tower and somehow it still feels right.
I walked into the living room this morning and he was there with 3 shots in a row. He said it was "tea time."
was his pinky out?
I saw a spider on my bed and my first reaction was to throw my weed bag to safety
I think I might start referring to your vagina as a separate being now
I was at a crossroads, dude. Like, do I wanna eat chicken McNuggets or talk about my feelings?
That chick keeps sending eggplant emojis
Welcome to dating in the digital age. Better catch up now that you’re divorced
and eggplant is code for penis. It means she’s DTF. Go get her tiger!!!
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