i know he has to tuck it when he gets excited in public and all, but now he is just starting to show off.
im poppin the ladies like they're bacne
I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
The only way I made it through work was reminding myself how many margaritas per hour I was making
i need you to babysit me first week back at school. havent had tequila, adderal, or sex w randoms in 3 months
Define 'illegal'. Your idea of it and my idea are in separate universes.
I feel like wearing underwear would just be poor planning
Look if you're not going to be mine and take care of my needs, I'm going to fuck your sisters.
You'd be surprised how many calories hedonism burns.
Hey. I can't work your space dryer so I'm wearing your blanket home. I'll get my clothes later. Fun party!
dude she got out of bed and definitely took a shit then checked her stomach out in the mirror and whispered "well that probably took off five pounds"
Not much, just taking another sorting hat quiz while waiting for this porno to finish buffering
So what are you going to be for halloween?
A woman sitting on her couch watching Hocus Pocus.
I work 80 hours a week to prevent myself from just laying in bed and masturbating all day. It's a hands off strategy.
I'll explain later but I just had to legally commit to abstinence for the next 4 months
Randomize
