There was a fist fight in my basement last night at four in the morning, in case you were wondering
somehow, due in part to drug cocktail and alchl prior to meeting, i blacked out, got home, made total mess of kitchen, broke shower, and made 17 hard boiled eggs
You were running around the house with a purple crayon asking people to call you harold..
I came home to burning cookies and him outside "tanning" naked.
He just wants an even tan
She came in to my room half naked at 3am asking me if I had seen the movie balls deep 7
Katie told the cabby "when the boat docks I'm getting off with you"
I can't. I think his penis is about to take out a restraining order against me.
Way too stoned bro. Was laying down on my back and thought for a good 30 mins what it would be like to be a turtle stuck on its shell
She was wearing my robin hood hat from Halloween shouting "steal from the rich and give to the poor, mothafuckaaaaas." We are taking her everywhere.
How much morphine is too much? Keep in mind that I'm going to my graduation dinner with my parents.
My dad just told me I can't passout in the driveway after the 4th of July parade this year, again
I almost took a picture but it looked like he might have a shank and I'm just not at a place in my life where I could handle having tetanus
Was your bare penis on or around my blanket?
His dick is the size of my forearm. Would it be rude to ask to take a comparison photo after sex?
Is it immoral to trade sex for the use of his laundry room?
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