Is it just me or do I always seem to have cum in my bellybutton?
i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
used foursquare to find where i am. please come get me. this is the scariest bedroom ever.
If its allowed to Tornado at 830am then Im allowed to have a beer and a cigarette at 830am
He went around feeding all the high kids pretzels. He's like their god now
there are some nice people on this island. free ride free pancakes and they even prayed for us when they dropped us off
Hungover like ... in bed with the Brita pitcher and a straw, only opening one eye at a time.
I can't believe you're trying to guilt me into a blow j because a tornado made you homeless.
Is it working?
I gave him shit for taking my sloppy seconds and when I woke up my eyebrow was gone
Pride is not for the college student young Padawan. Tequila is for the college student.
I'm smoking pot with a man in a pink suit, size 15 wide shoes who bought his bowl from a place called Chinese Bling Bling while I'm dressed as a unicorn drinking pumpkin beer
I really feel like I should slow down on the getting hammered. I told a bartender on "Taco Tuesday" that a $3 margarita was too expensive. And proceeded to have a $70 tab.
Is 28 too old to get fingered in Centennial Park? Asking for a friend.
He just yells "mush!" as they're having sex.
uh...sober saturday NEVER has a good ring to it.
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