Apparently I farted on her in my sleep. Then, just to be sure she was cool, I did it again on purpose and she didnt say anything. So, WIN?
Just saw the true definition of the muffin top and camel toe all on one person at the DC zoo... Tried to take a pic but she got away..
I just watched 2 blind guys walk into each other head on in providence. It pays to pregame in your car.
He hid IN a snowbank for 2 hours waiting for me to come home. This game has to stop before someone dies.
You should get with him and swear you have to use lambskin condoms. That'll test his veganism.
Got him to take a shot from the drip pan on the George Forman. He's gone now.
just had sex on top of a camper looking at the stars, BEAT THAT.
Maybe I'm just didn't notice and imagined a different penis as a Freudian coping mechanism?
I've already dropped her on the ground of a crowded bar dancing , been incoherent drunk to the point i couldn't speak and came within 2 seconds all on separate evenings so at this point she should know what I'm about
Yup. Dog walker, house sitter and mistress to the rich, bored and bi-curious. I've got a nice little operation running.
bought even stevens on dvd and enough weed and pizza bagels to last us a week.. ready to get snowed in?
I feel like we have a good system here turning our sketchy decisions into great stories.
We had a quickie at work in the office. He walked out before me, and I fell asleep while waiting a few minutes to walk out. Yeah. He's got that change your life dick
She's just a lonely cunt and i hope she stays that way for the rest of her fucking life.
This seems like an over reaction to someone eating your fries.
I consider walking to the bars and dancing my exercise and I buy doubles so my drinks r heavier so that's my arm workout
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