I know I'm not learning anything when I can't even spell the name of the class I'm taking
my boss said she was surprised to see me this morning. i told her there's a time in a girls life she has to give up day drinking in order to make money for next weekend's alcohol. she looked so proud, i think i might get a raise.
He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
My parents foreign exchange student just walked in on me whacking off. Welcome to America :)
Grape juice and vodka is NOT wine.
He used one end of the towel to wipe the cum and I used the other end to wipe the tears
He's spent his last 3 years working at Urban Outfitters. No, I'm not sad I missed out on a life of mustaches, the dollar menu and shitty scarves.
That doesn't help it make any more sense. Because now you've brought pinata condoms into this.
Let's just say that watching the sunrise in a space helmet is really the only way to do it.
Hey can we break in your window? We need to borrow the dog.
we're like Indians of the 21st century. trading not for food and survival but personal gain and by trouble you mean getting daytime drunk and going to the roller ring then yes.
My last google search of the night was "Things that cost $102.50"
I broke out the Krispy Kreme, and am possibly having random internet sex in less than an hour. I think I got this breakup under control.
I could run a drunk marathon in heels
This text constitutes a formal request for sexual congress under the terms of our Relationship Agreement.
Randomize