Dual....:-)
my new favorite insult= "thundercunt"
Going to pass out with da shoes on. hugging wallstreet journal from tuesday. please check me for liveliness in the morning.
im tired of her bring homeless men home when shes drunk. THEY ARE NOT FUCKING PETS!!!!
I want to throw all of their shoes in the pool so I feel like there is some justice in the world
For the record you were pretending you were in a rocket when you drove from wawa to your house. So like 2 minutes of me listening to you making rocket sounds over the phone lmfao
i woke up in just my socks. my clothes were outside, he had rugburn on his elbows, and a window was broken.
THEN YOU WILL NOT GET TO SEE MY TITS TONIGHT OR IN THE NEAR FUTURE YOU HEARTLESS BASTARD
They left a cherry picker with the keys in it on a college campus, what else were we supposed to do?
Just fell down the stairs..might wanna call the ambulance jus take the weed out of my pocket be4 they come..
I could have sworn that I went home last night... but judging from the couch I just woke up on, apparently not.
she said. She was going to, and I quote, "put her vagina inside my dick".
I am high. And my mom surpised me today. Now i am high and with my mom....bad idea
Do thigh high boots and a ball gag count as a costume?
If that pentatonix bullshit is playing when I get home we're breaking up
Randomize
