Nakedness is not a toga. Just sayin
I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
Upon hearing of his newfound access to every orifice... even ones he just made up... the Grinch's penis grew three sizes that day.
my fraternity brothers just had an intervention for me. i either have a problem or am just on some next-level shit, im gonna go with door number 2
you just kept yelling NO BUENO SENOR at the cashier and throwing coins at him, of course you were going to get kicked out of the grocery store
I've been thinking about it and if we ever have a threesome it'll start off with us clothed solely in our matching fur vests
Does peppermint hummus sound good or am I just high?
What time did you start drinking?
Maybe.
Maybe isn't a time...
So is there some kind of punch card you and I get to use every time we fuck a chick with a cast?
The fuck-me-pumps were hot, the XL hoody kinda ruined it.
I was woken up at 6 am by a second grader trying to give me a sweatshirt for a pillow
And Mike keeps telling Will that love at first sight is true and this is just a shit show. Help.
i literally have the attention span of a weasel on steroids, but yeah, i know who you’re talking about.
idk but im stoned n hiding in the bathroom from my kids with a really big bowl of really little candy bars
My penis definitely considers my Captain Cock costume a success
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