If my vagina had boots, it would be shaking in them.
yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
sunday morning discovery: something purple, smelly, and sticky my hair. any suggestions?
just had cupcakes and mountain dew for dinner-now i'm playing super mario brothers. 10 year olds all over the world would kill to be me.
my debit card account is gonna say movie, movie, ice cream, movie, cheese fries, get a fucking life, movie
He came in asked for the bathroom and came out 10 minutes later dripping wet took his redbull and left.
I'm eating dry tortillas on a mattress without a sheet. and i thought my life would change after graduation.
I wanna throw up and cum in that order
This is love.
Which part? The alcoholic cupcakes or the lesbian st paddys day party?
I was scared that I should know him but I was too busy blacking out to remember
He even wore it to bed. What the hell. He's too excited about that goddamn costume.
he just exposed your dildo usage to the table.
I didn't rip your fishnets, WE ripped your fishnets.
I'm at 45 minutes post orgasm, and I still feel my insides spasming. Pretty sure I just fucked Superman.
Tonight is an "I'm lonely and single so I'm going to curl up in a warm, melatonin and vodka enriched ball in the corner of my bed with a cat." kind of night.
Randomize
