i'm as serious about my hair as jesse from full house.
that is uncle jesse to you, show some respect.
While he was going down his phone rang and he answered saying I'll call you later I'm eating.
Dude, smoked out of a pumpkin tonight. I like Halloween more now
just saw way to many penises for it being 5 o'clock on a thursday
Just thought i should tell someone im on the roof, if i pass out up here because no one found me, im behind the chimney
She's been drinking and was roller blading. I'm sure you can do the math
Briing, briiing- tricycle ridden. Where is my crown?
you know, this Evan Williams whiskey isn't so bad when it's watered down a bit and you're home by yourself on a Saturday listening to Snoop Dog alone in your apartment without pants or any plans for your future...
Obviously he considers you not fucking him as fucking up. Thus making him fuck up. Based on this I believe he should be disqualified from the race to your vagina.
It's a hurricane, not a zombie apocalypse. WHY DID YOU BUY SHOTGUNS?!?!
so i ran into nick. i may be more gay than anticipated
Less than a month to go... I do not understand how I was able to put up with a roommate who wears bright green Crocs for a year.
I would have rather been getting my vagina slowly waxed all day then be here.
DUDE NEVER CALL THE COPS BACK
I got there and she was on her balcony drinking out of a bottle of vodka and smoking a cigar.
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