we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
her vagina looked like bernie madoff
Damn, it's been so long since I had sex I could use the cobwebs from my vagina to decorate for Halloween.
you're trying to get a guy who's been in a coma for 2 weeks and who thought he was in '08 yesterday to drive you to the liquor store?
yeah, you wanna come?
Welcome to the first annual slutathon and let the men be ever in our favor
Yes, I have your ice luge mold. I'll do a prisoner exchange for the beer bong
Just saw a guy with two baby turtles sneaking into the building
He told her Jesus wouldnt yell curse or degrade her. He'd just simply shake his head and slap the shit out of her
A man just sang Jennifer Lopez to me out his car window. I am not sure how I feel about this, but it is not positively.
I literally farted midsex as a siren for him to get the fuck off me.. No such luck.
I think I need to see a chiropractor after giving that blow job
Dude, I work in two hours. Unless you can find Chris Hemsworth and convince him to have a three-way with us, I'm not getting out of bed.
Fucking suck it up and drink your feelings like a normal human being.
I was so drunk I got stuck in the middle of a revolving door
Randomize
