JOSHUA! WE ARE SO BREAKING UP!
what?
YOU'RE DRUNK AGAIN, ARENT YOU?!
I dont wanna date her. I just wanna be able to run a blacklight over her face and prove ownership.
So guess who had sex in a Ghostbusters sleeping bag.
My therapist says she wants to work on my 'trust issues'. I think she's found the cash cow within.
This is so stupid. Now I have to call the party planner and tell her that the break up party is off. They decided to get back together.
Imagine the time you most wanted to kill yourself. Now add a room full of jail bait and no booze. Multiply that by a million.
I will fight anything that is not spinning right now
Dude they have your information. Come back. The sheriffs office is here, they are pissed..please come back otherwise jail is inevitable. Call me
I know for sure he's a bro because he closed the door so my gf didn't see me hooking up with her cousin.
Hey remember that time you called a woman a "man in a dress" and then threw up in a drinking fountain?
I rolled joints beforehand. Lit a candle. Ghetto rigged taping the 40's on my hands and then lit the joint using the flame of the candle.
I'm so proud of your modern ingenuity
I can't believe he just friend zoned me like that.
Dude, you're not even gay.
My cat just smacked my blunt from my hand and then put her head in my hand. I don't know how to feel
my goal is to never have a bac of 0.0 the whole time while in the state of florida, which means i have to chug a beer before i cross the state line
He's honking my boob in his sleep
It's innocent and endearing in some way
Randomize
