i just woke up in a strange room and the first thing i saw was a chewbacca mask... wtf
Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
i feel like a thai whore the morning after the navy left.
Spencer Pratt, I WILL beat the shit out of you someday, I Promise
I mean, it's free alcohol, to turn it down would be a crime against humanity.
I asked her if she was the outdoorsy type, she replied "I had sex on a fourwheeler once, does that count?"
He'd pee in it. And since it's PBR I'd have no idea
Now I'm obligated to stay and cuddle with her because the condom broke. Fuck.
I vaguely remember seeing that couple making out in front of that store and i yelled "I ALSO LOVE THE ROCKY MOUNTAIN SOAP COMPANY!"
IM WEARING A FLAG
So that's a no to the clothes then
FLAG
I have weed and a speedo - I don't need anything else.
And then I remembered we banged to Beethoven & I was like you will never get this ass again
The only thing about him that I appreciated was that he destroyed the bathroom at your birthday and missed singing to you. And we all knew.
Went upstairs to make PopTarts, found the door open. Shut it. Saw a grey thing. Opened the door, found a girl sleeping outside. What the fuck happened last nigh
So I'm buying milk, bread, yogurt & lube. Not awkward at all
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