with your own penis?
I wish Morgan Freeman narrated my life.
You were asking people if they could pee on you while you shotgunned beers
does dane cook know its not 2004 and that hes no longer relevant?
Just saw a picture of your new tub, cant wait to pee in it
i was actually impressed that she managed to throw up underwater while scuba diving
hey remember that 14 year old i met 5 years ago who i said i would bang 5 years from then?
Yup.
sorry for allegedly lighting the beer pong balls of fire
I'm using her two yr old as a arm rest while I attempt to feel her up. Somehow she is allowing it. How this transitions to sex should be interesting.
High Amy loves you. Sober Amy is unsure, but she's not here so fuck that bitch.
Ok, so technically yes she wore a red tank top to the stoplight party. But under it was a yellow bra and green panties.
I've had sex to the movie Tommy Boy too many times to be acceptable.
this is gentle reminder #1 not to forget to bring the vibrator when you come
I was having a dream that I was swimming in a pool filled with melted chocolate but woke up to find I had poured chocolate milk all over my body
I'm pretty sure my therapist gave me the green light to fuck him.
Randomize
