I'm at work and it's 1:30. I need a beer. is that bad?
Welcome to every minute of my life.
Honestly, I don't care whether it was a guy or a girl. Best blowjob ever.
Ah, I knew it wouldn't be long before my boobs were introduced into the conversation.
I asked him if his doormat had a name, then proceeded to sit on it for the next 30 minutes while signing that magic carpet ride song from aladdin.
all 3 of us brought blondes home last night. all 3 are passed out. we're gonna switch rooms and see how long until one of them notices.
I'm gonna make a therapist very happy and very wealthy this semester.
I AM THERE IN SPIRIT, TICKLING YOUR BALLS
I'm pretty sure we scarred one of our coworkers. This is the second time he has caught us both fully undressed and banging at work.
Either he has bad timing or he wants to join.
Dude. You stood in a corner laughing your ass off while folding clothes, facing the wall. Yes, they were weed brownies..
I've never seen a dude bust out of his jacket and rock an air banjo like u
The extent of "getting it in" was this creepy guy sticking his finger in my bellybutton
Uh I almost got the bride to go down on me. I'm the smoothest maid of honor ever.
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
HEY I WILL KIDNAP THE FUCK OUT OF YOUR PET GOAT
Turns out dignity is priceless and Plan B costs $41.09
Randomize
