i just ran into my boss at the liquor store. we didnt exchange words, just nodded in mutual understanding.
i have now been nicknamed the screamer on the first, third, fourth, & six floor by all the ra's. only two more floors to go before i cover the entire dorm.
Let's cut to the chase. What days are we sleeping together this week?
My bruised ribs were so worth that win in beer pong
I spent the whole weekend building houses out of popsicle sticks for my bowls. How was your weekend?
his finger was half off and he was more concerned that he wasnt at home shooting cucumbers out of his potato gun.
He came over and said its legs day so put them in the air! Fucked me for 30 minutes and said he had dinner reservations to go to. Well i just ran into him and his friends hammered at Taco Bell
I'm just trying to absorb as much of the fluids from the carpet as I can.
I just found my lube on the ground next to my bed. I would pay money to find out what the fuck happened that night.
I know you're aving fun across the room but I can clearly see you getting a handy. It's not as "low key" as she promised. Also, why are you texting while she's doing it?!
just pleasured myself to USA hockey beating Russia in the shoot out. god bless America.
I woke up missing my shoes and my left eyebrow. MY. EYEBROW.
He's talking about feelings now. I don't even know if he came???
We need a signal or code word for "I basically shaved my whole body and we should touch each other tonight".
I swear to god, no guy has been as interested in sticking stuff up my butt as this girl
Randomize
